Contemporary Clichés

Fiction by K.R. Martinak

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Something I just saw on TV

Posted by Kyle Martinak on December 1, 2008

So, I’ve just been informed by Fox News that certain college campuses have their own scents…in the form of scented candles. If these candles were accurate representations of the campuses they are named for, they would smell like flat beer, marijuana, stale doritos, vomit, bad pizza, melted plastic from an Xbox, and flop-sweat. Instead, they probably smell like sage. Eugene does not smell like sage. Nothing smells like sage, actually. Not even sage itself.

I was also watching Family Guy and they ripped on Dane Cook. They also ripped on any college dipshit that watches Dane Cook on Youtube. As if people who watch Dane Cook are all simple-minded Myspace douche-bags, because Dane Cook is in fact, a douche-bag. My gripe with this: Family Guy is only funny to simple-minded Myspace douche-bags. Perhaps Seth McFarlane should not insult his only audience, which is primarily made of college dipshits, who watch it on Youtube…like me.

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2 Responses to “Something I just saw on TV”

  1. eclipsestar said

    I agree. I’m pretty sure the Eugene-scented candle would get you buzzed instantly. No wait, they already have those in Eugene, they just don’t call them “candles.”

    And Family Guy does need to STFU pretty heavily.

  2. CtotheJ said

    Shut up Kyle. Dane Cook /is/ a douche bag

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